Our baby boy went to heaven on Thursday, June 30th. He was 13 weeks along. I held his perfectly formed little body in my hand and I will never be the same again.
I'm told there was nothing I did wrong, but there were many stressors that certainly didn't help the situation. I was determined to make it to Minnesota to visit my friend Esther and her family, and then drive over to South Dakota to be with my grandparents, family, and extended family for a reunion. After an unbelievably stressful day of travels and heavy loads, Kyle and I finally made it to a surprise overnight layover stop in Chicago. Shortly after arriving, I started bleeding. Once in Minnesota, and before leaving the airport, I inquired about the first flight back to Southern California. I knew, though I desperately wanted to believe it would be like the last time and turn out fine. My friend helped me make the decision to lay low and rest a day to see if that would help. I was in no condition to fly again. I'm so thankful she did. Because in what would have been an hour into my flight, had I gone, I experienced the most traumatic event of my life.
We are grieving. Beyond what words can describe. Seeing the baby took this pain to an entirely different level. Rudy flew out to Minnesota and is here with us now. While Kyle slept, Ru and I shared a very special time with our baby. It was excruciatingly painful yet strangely beautiful as we felt God's peace wash over us. It was a good way to begin our long process of healing.
We are so thankful for our Kyle. He brings us much comfort and joy. And of course, though we can't understand why this happened, we still trust our God and are leaning on him minute by minute.
Arrangements will be made as soon as possible for a burial near home. Thank you, in advance, for any prayers on our behalf.
I'm told there was nothing I did wrong, but there were many stressors that certainly didn't help the situation. I was determined to make it to Minnesota to visit my friend Esther and her family, and then drive over to South Dakota to be with my grandparents, family, and extended family for a reunion. After an unbelievably stressful day of travels and heavy loads, Kyle and I finally made it to a surprise overnight layover stop in Chicago. Shortly after arriving, I started bleeding. Once in Minnesota, and before leaving the airport, I inquired about the first flight back to Southern California. I knew, though I desperately wanted to believe it would be like the last time and turn out fine. My friend helped me make the decision to lay low and rest a day to see if that would help. I was in no condition to fly again. I'm so thankful she did. Because in what would have been an hour into my flight, had I gone, I experienced the most traumatic event of my life.
We are grieving. Beyond what words can describe. Seeing the baby took this pain to an entirely different level. Rudy flew out to Minnesota and is here with us now. While Kyle slept, Ru and I shared a very special time with our baby. It was excruciatingly painful yet strangely beautiful as we felt God's peace wash over us. It was a good way to begin our long process of healing.
We are so thankful for our Kyle. He brings us much comfort and joy. And of course, though we can't understand why this happened, we still trust our God and are leaning on him minute by minute.
Arrangements will be made as soon as possible for a burial near home. Thank you, in advance, for any prayers on our behalf.
Dear, dear Mindy and Rudy,
ReplyDeleteMy heart is breaking for you, for your entire family. I can't imagine the trauma, the grief of losing your little one. I don't know what components God put in your hearts to handle this, but I feel sure that handle it you will. I would give anything to have this not be true. Please know that you are so deeply loved and surrounded by family and friends who stand by you, grieving and praying for your strength.
Love,
V